14 July

Uncle Jack still gone. I guess I know what that means. I must find a way out of this today. Must discover some fun. I have only just escaped from dear Miss Prism by telling Dr. Chasuble a little white lie. I informed him that Miss Prism had a slight headache and suggested a "stroll." He said he would "Hang upon her lips!" Then he called her *Egeria*! Said it was a reference to the *pagans*! I think he has been making love to her!

!!!!!! Ernest is here!!!!!!! At last! And he is exactly as I imagined him. He says I am the "visible personification of absolute perfection" and then he proposed! 3:00pm More later. No, now I am to be a married woman, I will put aside childish diaries once and for all.

(Ed's note: there follow no more entries, and documentary evidence has not been found to provide any further information on a Cecily Cardew, aged 18, from Hertfordshire.)

3 July

Horrid lessons of absolutely *all* kinds today. Miss Prism is *quite* a mood. Dr. Chasuble is quite overwhelmed with christening this week and so unable to take Miss Prism off my hands. Finally found time between tea and dinner to receive a letter from Ernest. He says he certainly *hopes* that I will refuse attentions from any boys besides him, as it is not proper to receive gifts from one to whom one is not engaged. I certainly will be obliged to firmly say, but sweetly, sorry.

27 June

Miss Prism in a sweeter mood today at breakfast after I asked her how she was feeling on this fine morning. We even went for a short stroll together to wish a fine morning to Dr. Chasuble. I even sang a matin to him, and he was quite entirely amazed. Speechless, even. After we left him, Miss Prism noted that my spirits have been high of late and said she is quite pleased that I have given up my entire *obsessions* with Ernest and with Peter. She says she felt quite sure I would never have thrown my life away on a male beauty in distress.

11 June

Today, dear Miss Prism has taken me to sing for Dr. Chasuble. After I practiced my scales and my two pieces, Miss Prism stayed on to play the rector's piano forte a bit longer, and I went for a stroll in the garden and watered the roses until Moulton came along and took the watering can away from me. Really, if he does not want anyone watering the garden, I can't understand *why* he leaves the watering can out so very often. Miss Prism says it is because he is a bit senile. Miss Prism loves Italian.

8 June

Lovely day, and I distracted Miss Prism from these entirely *incessant* lessons by taking her from a walk through the garden and as far as the schools. On the way back, we ventured into the rectory for a short prayer (that Ernest shall return safe and soon) and a chat with *dear* Dr. Chasuble, who kept Miss Prism after. Rest of day alone. Uncle Jack spending an *excessive* amount of time in his library. He is becoming entirely *hermitish*! But tomorrow we will get him out at last. Tomorrow Uncle Jack and I travel to the Arbuthnots' for the week-end. *Two* evening parties! I hope Rupert will be there.

4 June

Today Dr. Chasuble made a new sermon entitled "The Messiah: Man or Mouse?" It was saying that we live in an age of ideals. It was quite a successful sermon. My ideal is Ernest.

Oh dear, I am so very *bored* of late. I have even taken up reading the back issues of the London Times in the library. I certainly never believed I would have been driven to such extremes.

28 May

Quite possibly the most boring day ever. Miss Prism entirely *missing* today, and Uncle Jack entirely confining himself to the library all day again. Merriman *hovering* everywhere I went. Nothing to do outside. Dr. Chasuble engrossed in christenings. Finally went and sat by Uncle Jack in the library. Excessively boring.

P.S. It's spelled "celibate"—and it means a person who is not married and has no relations. I am a celibate.

27 May

Miss Prism absolutely refused to speak about Ernest today. In fact, she called him "unspeakable." She is unhappy today, and Dr. Chasuble is away, so I asked her if she is in love with Dr. Chasuble. She said *certainly not*, he is a celebate! and then spoke *most ferociously* on the impudence of the natives (in India) and then ended lessons early. I wonder what has got her so *nervous*?

9 May

Nothing to do at all today. Miss Prism off with Dr. Chasuble after morning vespers and breakfast. I *do* hate morning vespers. They are held so desperately *early*. I am always so frightfully ravenous by the time they start. It is most inconvenient. Uncle Jack always says I have a capital appetite and that it is a sign of good breeding.

At breakfast, ate all the muffins. Dr. Chasuble says perhaps my appetite is a touch too capital. The others were all quite put out.

2 May

Everyone entirely useless today. The entire village and everyone on the estates stayed up reveling far too late in the evening. It seems to me that *this* is the day that should be the holiday. Our breakfast was lumpy, our midday was nothing but cold cuts, our tea was dull, and our supper involved rutabagas. I detest rutabagas! Uncle Jack spent the entire day in his library, Miss Prism forgot about lessons entirely (she had a headache) and Dr. Chasuble was quite cranky, which is not at all like him. I was left to mourn my great disappointment on my own.

12 April

We all (Uncle Jack, Miss Prism, Dr. Chasuble, Mudie and I) went for a long stroll in the park toady. The weather was charming until just before tea, but we made it indoors *just* in time! Then it cleared again in time for tea, which we took in the garden. Mudie has been quizzing me about all my activities—she wants to know all about what young girls do in the country. *I* want to know all about what young ladies do in the city!

10 April

Mudie quizzed me on her birthday 3-volume novel this morning. At the last, I was obliged to own I had not finished it as yet. Told her I was reading as slowly as possible since I simply cannot *bear* for it to end. Dr. Chasuble says a lie that hurts no one is not *really* a lie in God's eyes.
Short note from Ernest wishing me a very lovely Easter and a most joyous end to Lent. Horrid Lent! Why do we have to celebrate (?) Lent? It seems very unfair!

8 April

Ernest *is* a gambler! And a drinker "to the point of intoxication" Miss Prism said. Not to me, of course. I listened in on her after-sermon chat with Dr. Chasuble again this morning, and apparently she heard it *directly from Uncle Jack*! Dr. Chasuble is praying for him. Miss Prism seems to feel that the time is well past for prayers. I am intoxicated with Ernest!

Uncle Jack arrived with Mudie this afternoon. She will be staying the whole week.

20 March

Uncle Jack gone just for today and part of tomorrow. Weather entirely charming today, so we held lessons out-of-doors, and Dr. Chasuble came by to take Miss Prism for a walk to "keep fresh her complexion." Little Francine kept me company, and we were having such fun behaving like sisters until she told me in confidence to whom the snake belongs. She says it was *Peter*(!) and that all the Marys saw it too and that's why they are no longer here. What a wicked, wicked girl she is! I will nevermore believe her lies. I took to my bed at once.

19 March

My 18th birthday, and not yet married. This is a source of great sadness for me. I shall be obliged to speak to Ernest about setting a date *right away*. I must admit I had hoped he would have done so *for* my birthday, but the dear boy is so forgetful! He bought me the most beautiful little bangle with a true lover's knot. I have promised him always to wear it. I also received several new dresses, a small and very lady-like string of pearls, a little prayer book from Dr. Chasuble, A Young Lady's Book of Manners (1895 supplement) from Miss Prism and a *3-volume novel* from Mudie. Charming weather.

2 March

Dr. Chasuble says "it is high time" I ended my lessons with him. He says he will speak to me about my campaign at a later date, as it is not a proper subject for the Lenten period. Now that I think of it, nothing at all seems to be a proper subject for the Lenten period.

Evening—Uncle Jack back. No word of Ernest. Mutton for dinner. I *do* love mutton!

26 February

I have begun a campaign to convince dear Dr. Chasuble to baptize the dear little lambs when they are born. I feel that Our Lord Jesus would wish it. I know I wish it. I am naming the campaign the Christen Christ the Lamb's Lamb Campaign (CCLLC).

24 February

Miss Prism has decided that since I am to study with Dr. Chasuble every day, she will relocate *her* day lessons to the rectory for now.

Horrid Geography!

Horrid weather. We were entirely *sopping* by the time we arrived at the rectory, and after all, Dr. Chasuble was too busy with christenings (as usual) to give any lesson of any kind.

I know animals don't have souls, but I think they deserve to go to heaven anyway. I think it would be so cute to baptize the little lambs when they are born!

23 February

I have asked Uncle Jack for a chemistry set, but he is so far resisting. He has suggested that I pay more attention to the lessons that I already have. I think he must have spoken to Miss Prism about me too, because she absolutely *refused* to speak about Ernest at all today. And I have been assigned special lessons with Dr. Chasuble (!) every day for *two weeks*!

Ernest wrote today to tell me that he loves me more than flowers. What a sweet, simple boy he is!

20 February

I have been thinking more about the idea of Ernest being a revolutionary, and I have decided it is quite a proper thing for him to be after all. Revolutionaries are, I am told, quite dangerous indeed, and I do like dangerous men. I believe they are always very well dressed. One must always be impeccably (sp?) dressed for a revolution.

Miss Prism in conference with Dr. Chasuble for most of the afternoon.

No letter from Ernest! He must be *extremely* busy!